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March 8, 2010

The 5 Love Languages

How many of you have heard about the best-selling book "The 5 Love Languages" by Dr. Gary Chapman? Well I just finished reading it last night (for the 3rd time) and I cannot tell you how much I love this book. If you haven't read it yet, I encourage you to check it out!

This book is not only designed to help people understand and express love in romantic relationships, but also with friends and family. The Web site provided this synopsis as a great insight into the heart of this book:

After many years of counseling, Dr. Chapman noticed a pattern: everyone he had ever counseled had a “love language,” a primary way of expressing and interpreting love. He also discovered that, for whatever reason, people are usually drawn to those who speak a different love language than their own.

Of the countless ways we can show love to one another, five key categories, or five love languages, proved to be universal and comprehensive—everyone has a love language, and we all identify primarily with one of the five love languages:

- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch.

For those who are a little confused or unsure about what this means or what love language(s) are yours, I will use myself as an example.

My most predominant love language is quality time, followed by words of affirmation & physical touch as equal second place winners. This being said, if someone wanted to try to show me how much they care about me, quality alone time would mean the most to me. For me, time = love. For example, when I go home to see my family and my mom wants to go have coffee together just the two of us, that means the world to me. That special time with my mom says "I love you" to me.

The second language that makes my heart melt is words of affirmation. I almost feel like I continuously need to be reminded that someone cares. A sweet and sincere note, whether handwritten or by e-mail, telling me that I am missed or being thought of just completely makes my day. My dad is super great at this - I love getting notes from him asking me about my plans or telling me he's excited to spend time with me.

Another example of "words": Today, my dear friend Kenny, author of the lovely food blog Food Swain , sent me the sweetest e-mail that completely made my day. It simply said how much he enjoys reading my blog and that I inspired him to start a blog of his own. I cannot tell you how much sunshine Kenny added to my day - thank you, dear friend!

My final love language is physical touch. Once again, this doesn't necessarily have to mean sappy hand holding (although I love that too!), it can also be a friendly gesture of care. For me, a kiss on the forehead, touch on the arm, twirl of my hair or a long hug makes me so happy! My dear, sweet BF is very good at knowing that I need a hug after a long day or he can tell that I just want to snuggle while relaxing and watching TV.

Do you know what your love language is? More importantly, do you know how to love others in their love language? It is when people not only know how to love you the way you would like to be loved, but it is when you truly love others the way they need... that's when all is right and lovely in the world.

To learn more about this book, the other love languages, or if you want to take the love language quiz to find out yours, click here!

My challenge to you this week is to go out of your way to love somebody. Who in your life could use an extra dose of love?


  1. I say quality time too!

    quality time as in this weekend in KC with my sissy!

  2. I sure love you, Brother Bear. I can't wait to see you!

    Hope your week is wonderful :)

  3. I love everything about this blog: your musings, your constantly changing design scheme and the useful information! Thanks for sharing Meg. You're the best!

  4. You are the sweetest! Thank you so very much... I love blogging and I'm excited that you enjoy it too!


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